This article juxtaposes the configuration of the HDS Reserved and Colourful scales. As described in the last post on HDS conflicts, high Reserved individuals may appear interpersonally insensitive and prefer to work alone. In contrast, high Colourful folks seek attention through their self-promoting actions; they are likely very self-confident individuals who like to be the center of attention and are easily distracted under stress and pressure.
At first glance, these two behaviours are quite opposite. If these behaviours are exhibited separately by the same individual, others will not know what to expect from this person in terms of how they will react to stress and pressure. They may withdraw from others and avoid interactions with those around them. Or, they may draw attention to themselves and distract others with their extreme confidence or unusual antics. These two behaviors can also coincide in stressful situations. In such cases, an individual is likely to use their intense moodiness or insensitivity to attract attention to themselves versus withdrawing from those around them.
While strikingly opposite reactions to stress, we can reconcile how an individual who exhibits both stress-induced tendencies might behave by better understanding what is triggering each of these derailers. Is it a particular person, project or environment that is causing an individual to react in one of these manners? Perhaps they withdraw from their boss or superior, and exhibit more Colourful tendencies when interacting with their peers or subordinates. If the individual is derailing in both manners at the same time, it could likely be a certain environment or person that is triggering such a response. Probe them to understand if and when these tendencies emerge separately and/or together.
In terms of coaching these folks, there are a couple of approaches you can take. For the high Reserved side, help them understand that their tendency to be direct when communicating with others can hinder their ability to build teams and collaborate. Encourage them to occasionally check in with others to gauge that their overall message was communicated clearly to others. They should also consider how others are feeling and watch out for times that they say something that is hurtful to others.
Alternatively, for the high Colourful side, it is important for them to understand that there are other ways to convey their emotions and opinions. Encourage them to find alternative ways to share their thoughts with others. Walk them through which interpersonal strategies could be most effective in making a desired point. Encourage them to engage in active listening, interrupt less frequently, and paraphrase to ensure understanding.
Bringing these two together, from an individual who is moody and insensitive in order to draw attention to themselves, we may see that their emotional displays attract attention but sometimes alienate others. Help these individuals understand the importance of making genuine connections with others and how fostering these kinds of relationships can facilitate success in their role. Instead of voicing one’s one opinion all the time in an effort to draw attention, encourage the individual to talk with others about what is going on with them. They should also pay close attention to the impact of their own non-verbal communication when interacting with others. Have the individual reflect on a time where they exhibited moodiness or were insensitive to others in order to draw attention to themselves. Walk them through to identify what the situation was and what triggered their tendency to exhibit these behaviors. In one column, have them write down what verbal or physical displays were made in order to get a rise out of others. In a second column, have them write an alternative approach to each verbal or physical reaction that they could implement in future situations to better address the issue at hand.
